Friday, January 16, 2009

True Love

This picture was taken on March 31st 1962 in Hull, England.

My little heart is breaking. Today has been a bitter sweet day. Since the phone call at 2:30am this morning, Lance and I have been awake and we are both pretty worn out. I called Julia, my supervisor this morning and told her the sad news and let her know I would be going into work. I knew it was the best thing to do. The day would have been much tougher had I decided to stay home.

I called a good friend, Ruth who lives in CA. She has one of those voices you could listen to all day and a face you could stare at all day too. She is beautiful. What a blessing it is to have such wonderful friends.

I called my co-worker and good friend, Beth. She asked if we could meet up for lunch. FOOD! I hadn't even thought about eating. That's what friends are for, to remind you of the simple things. It was exactly just what I needed. I think she is in the wrong job....I seriously think she needs to be in the field of Therapy. She helped me more than she will ever know. It was her day off and she took the time to care. Beth even drove to work to make sure I got settled in ok.

I was greeted by hugs and warm words from such caring friends. I seriously spent the day with my second family. I work at such a wonderful place that that is how it feels, another family. I was so tired that I didn't think I would even get through the day.

Last Christmas, when my Parents were here visiting us they gave me a gift on Christmas morning. When I opened the gift I saw a copy of the picture shown today in a beautiful white frame. Instantly, my eyes welled up. I said "Dad you were so good looking" He answered "What do you mean, WERE?" ;) He often told us that. It sits right on my piano and I look at it so often.

I have felt their love for each other all my life. Of course they have had their problems and issues but I have never ever known a couple to love each other so much as to want to spend every minute of every day with each other. I told my Mom today that had it been the other way round and she had been sick with cancer, I would have been in England a lot sooner. My Dad could simply not cope without her. My Mom has been so brave throughout all this. When she called to tell me the news this morning, I was in awe at how composed she was. I cannot imagine being married to somebody for 47 years and to look at him and see him being taken out of the house in such a manner. I have spoken to my Mom many times today. I called Michael, Rebecca and Jared and the love we have for our Husband and Father is so apparent.

I was so concerned for my Mom that I had her call me at work just to hear she was doing ok. She sounded so tired. I joked with her and told her she would more than likely sleep for a whole week due to all she has gone through. It is 8:30pm for me just now (3:30am for her) and I can't help but wonder how she is doing and how she must be feeling.

Dad has passed the test. He didn't need to endure anything anymore and has been called home. He must be so happy now. He has been sick/ill for so long now that he must just be feeling wonderful. I can only imagine him wanting Mom to join him.

THANK YOU to all of you who have sent messages via facebook, comments to this blog, e-mails, phone calls. I am going to print all the messages and save them in a memory book. I have been working hard during the past months to get together some books in his memory.

One of our very good friends arranged to have some flowers sent to us from various friends. Another very good friend brought dinner over to us. I probably wouldn't have eaten anything hadn't it been for my friend Beth taking me to lunch or my friend Debbie bringing dinner to us.

Most of you know that Lance and I named our son John after my Dad. This morning he gave me the usual good morning hug and I looked like I had just finished ten rounds with Mike Tyson ;) I told John how Grandad had gone to Heaven to live with Jesus. This little innocent child looked right at me and said "Why? Doesn't he love Grandma anymore". Awwww, how cute! He saw my suitcase half filled and then asked "Did Grandad take his case to Jesus' house?" I explained he didn't need a case and one day I will explain how Dad did everything he needed to do to get into Jesus' house.

I don't know whether my Dad realized how much he was loved by so many people, but as his daughter, it is a terrific feeling to know that you can now carry on his legacy.
This picture was taken outside the same church.........45 years later (2007)


"We love you Dad"

2 comments:

Renee said...

Hi Max, so sorry to hear about your dad. Great big hugs and prayers are being sent your way.

Alan Tong said...

Maxine,

AS you are aware, I will have the privilege of speaking at your dad's funeral. Usually I do not write down my talks. I sort of formulate them in my mind, and then present them. This allows the Spirit to insert and take out various bits and pieces, rather than me reading out verbatim. At this moment, I know roughly what I am going to be saying. Would you like me to write that out, and then adjust it afterwards to put in and leave out the bits that get added or taken away?

Your dad is a special man who has made friends all over the world. I am very much aware that many people who know and love your dad will not be able to attend in person due to distances, work commitments and many other circumstances. Many of them may want to know what was said on the day. If I was unable to make it I would be grateful to read some of what was said, as this would allow me to at least be a part of the day retrospectively.

If I send it to your e-mail after the funeral you could then use whatever parts you wanted to in your Blog.

Please let me know if you would like that.

Love and warm regards,

Alan.